by Marjorie

My assigned topic for my English 48 essay makes me feel uneasy.

Our very smart instructor brought six Chinese cards with him. And each of the six cards corresponds to our future essay subject. So when I picked one, I got the 6th card which means conflict, and with that the assigned topic for me is “UNTHINKABLE.”

I prayed to get a good card for a good topic, unfortunately I felt so uncomfortable. Our teacher said that the card we chose says something about us. Conflict, unthinkable….

What do these words mean?

Am I having this inner battle, which I don’t want to let go?

I just don’t know. And feeling so confused and paranoid, I typed the easy word “unthinkable” at my phone’s online dictionary. And it says:


–     you are emphasizing that it cannot possibly be accepted or imagined as a possibility.

–     is use to describe a situation, event, or action which is extremely unpleasant to imagine or remember.

And suddenly, I’m in daze. I don’t know what to write. I’m perplexed with so many thoughts. I can’t think clearly.

I’m just really curious, because Sir told me that according to Chinese beliefs, I didn’t choose the card. The card chose me.